Among the assorted cruelties of teenage life, Valentine’s Day ranks up there.

I remember in 10th grade actually receiving a school candy gram (those little notes with a candy taped onto them which you could buy and send to your valentine). Cheerful student government classmates would come by to call out the names of those blessed few who were popular or pretty enough to get candy grams. I was always part of the vast forgotten majority. But wonder of wonders, I actually got one that year. I don’t remember the message on the card, but it was an anonymous note of some sort.

With my usual cool, analytical skills diminished at having received a note from a secret admirer, I overlooked a fact, which, if I tell you, would immediately seem obvious. My sister was a senior in the same high school. Maybe it becomes even clearer if I add that this particular sister was quite rascally. It was not a nice thing to do. She had fun with it, her and her giggling friends. It’s a cruel day, Valentine’s Day. An invention by confectioners and card makers, no doubt.

But there are more serious reasons why I don’t like Valentine’s Day. There’s a song called At Seventeen by Janis Ian that climbed to the top of the charts, and over a million copies of the album were sold. It obviously touched a nerve. I am sure you’ll see why when you read the lyrics.

At Seventeen
I learned the truth at seventeen
That love was meant for beauty queens
And high school girls with clear skinned smiles
Who married young and then retired

The valentines I never knew
The Friday night charades of youth
Were spent on one more beautiful
At seventeen I learned the truth

And those of us with ravaged faces
Lacking in the social graces
Desperately remained at home
Inventing lovers on the phone
Who called to say come dance with me
And murmured vague obscenities
It isn't all it seems
At seventeen

….

To those of us who know the pain
Of valentines that never came
And those whose names were never called
When choosing sides for basketball

It was long ago and far away
The world was younger than today
And dreams were all they gave for free
To ugly duckling girls like me

It’s sad that on a day set up to celebrate love, it’s only romantic love—with the aristocracy of beauty as the main criteria for determining its winners—that gets the limelight. So, I am glad to know that this Valentine’s Day, about 350 members of Gracepoint will be fanning out into the Bay Area to visit 17 different elderly homes, convalescent hospitals, homeless shelters, and women’s shelters to bring a different kind of Valentine’s Day message, with crafts, skits, song and dance, games and food.

This will be our second Valentine’s Day of Compassion, and we’ve been the more richly blessed by it, because it did not end with just one day. Throughout the year, we’ve been going back monthly to see the folks there, and experiencing our own hearts expanding, friendships forming across generations, and several elderly folks putting their faith in Christ as a result.

So, if you want to send a Valentine candy gram to one of our brothers or sisters, they won’t be available to receive it tonight. They won't be “desperately remain[ing] at home” waiting for “valentines that never came.” They’ll be bringing a new kind of Valentine’s Day to many of the forgotten of our area. Praise the Lord!